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 Post subject: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 11:56 pm 
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Joined: Mon Mar 30, 2009 3:22 am
Posts: 41
Location: United States
I'm specifically offering this question mostly to the men who are in their 40's & 50's.

Are you really looking for a twenty-something lady? Besides the youthful appearance and the potential to have children, what is the attraction?

I personally am only interested in women in their 40's and 50's - and mid-40's is pretty much my minimum. I do admit that I will look at profiles of of nearly all women, but I won't introduce myself to a woman that is so young that there isn't much hope of finding any common ground.

Thank in advance for your replies!

-stan


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 5:43 am 
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Joined: Fri Dec 26, 2008 7:41 am
Posts: 146
Location: United States
My first wife was 15 years younger than me. I enjoyed the difference because I am very active, I also have young children. I am looking for a woman with nearly the same difference in age. mid 30's to mid 40's. Perhaps a little older depending on the woman's attitude and our ability to match.

If she has children, I would like for them to be nearly the same ages as my children so there is a good possibility they are friends and will accept each other as family.

Below 30, the people have not fully matured and do not yet fully understand their own mind and desires. So for me, perhaps 10/15 years younger is good depending on the ages of her children.


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 12:07 pm 
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Joined: Mon Mar 30, 2009 3:22 am
Posts: 41
Location: United States
Thank you jscottv, for your response.


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 11:01 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 12:14 am
Posts: 38
Location: United States
I am 48 and I am looking for someone between 35-55. I don't understand those guys that are looking for someone that young. And have people wandering If she is your daughter or granddaughter. When she is your wife


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 3:53 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 10:56 am
Posts: 63
Location: Ukraine
t3st3r6uy wrote:
I'm specifically offering this question mostly to the men who are in their 40's & 50's.

Are you really looking for a twenty-something lady? Besides the youthful appearance and the potential to have children, what is the attraction?
-stan

Dear men it is easy to understand that you can feel yourself very young and proud a lot that such babe is near....but please just be realistic - in your 20's what did you yourself though about people who are in their 40's & 50's. When the girl is so young she has to do great compromises may be so great that it would be impossible to build a good family....even if she is not a lier


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 2:33 pm 
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Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2009 1:01 pm
Posts: 10
Location: United States
I only want a woman in her 40's and 50's. Even 30's is too young. We, (men) may enjoy looking at young ladies but I would never want a relationship with one. There is just too much drama. I see it in my children. I have two daughters in their 20's. I have lived too hard to want to go through it again :). I think most serious older men will tell you the same. Life experience is inmeasurable as an attribute when it comes to a relationship. My girlfriend is 55 and AMAZING. She looks like she is in her early 40's. I am a lucky man, and, I treat her as such. Hope that sheds some light.


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 8:17 pm 
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Joined: Fri Dec 26, 2008 7:41 am
Posts: 146
Location: United States
Not a single person here in their 40's and 50's has said they want a woman in her twenties... I think this question is solved.


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 4:49 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2009 1:26 pm
Posts: 4
Location: United States
jscottv:
"Not a single person here in their 40's and 50's has said they want a woman in her twenties... I think this question is solved."

I tend to disagree with you, Jscottv. Only a few of us from this dating site have answered so far to this Q. How many men are here, and from many other dating sites, in their's 40's and 50's who would not answer, or at least think, the way we do? There are, more likely, many men of such ages who would prefer, and even specifically look, to have women younger than 30's, maybe even under the 20's.
I've personally seen many selected pictures of the "happy ending" marriages (used in advertising purpose) after dating via various sites. On most of those pictures women were substantially younger, quite a few of them even 15+ years younger, than their respective spouses. There is no doubt in my mind, just about all of those men were aware that very young and desperate ladies would marry them just b/c of financial securities. The love, they claim as a main driving force to their respective marriage, is not a true love, rather financially and circumstantial advantage motivated.
In my opinion, women in their late teens and early 20' should not attempt to date much older men than themselves, and almost under no circumstances they should get married to those men, with the exceptions of a rare and unique cases. We should not attempt to deprive them from living their youthful lives in full as we, older than them men, have already done it, so they can more securely wait for the years when they will become much more wiser and capable to choose the most suitable men for themselves.

As far as ages comparability, I would prefer my woman to be pretty close to my age, maybe a few years lesser or more than mine, for we expect only from the women's inner beauty to last forever.


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 6:44 am 
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Joined: Fri Dec 26, 2008 7:41 am
Posts: 146
Location: United States
You do make a good point. An older man looking to marry a girl the age of his Grand Daughter would probably be too ashamed to say so...

But I would also like to add that an older man who is proven and secure, need not "marry" a young girl to enjoy the "benefits" of a young girl... and they need not look into foreign lands to find them.

But the world is full of fools of all sort.. man, woman, young and old.. so anything is definitely always possible.... "caveat emptor"

AND Trevian, thanks for writing. I wish more would. The way to keep this board interesting and fun is for MORE people to participate. Keep it up.


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 11:46 pm 
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Posts: 4
Location: United States
fredabishop:
"My girlfriend is 55 and AMAZING. She looks like she is in her early 40's. I am a lucky man, and, I treat her as such. Hope that sheds some light."

Indeed fredabishop, but such cases, as yours, are becoming less amazing as not possible to happen and more believing in as a true reality.
I've been reading and hearing more and more about such or similar statements where women look 10 to 20 years younger, especially in their 40's, 50's, 60's and even in 70's. I've personally met 2 of those kind of ladies, and I must admit, it was a real fascination. Their entire exteriors literally looked at least 10t years younger. Such rejuvenated women's beauty, combine with their great inner beauties, could make just about any men to cherish them, and to even become crazy about them.
What is happening internationally and in a large scale?
Woman's rejuvenating body and facial technology is becoming so sophisticated that in the near future any woman, between their 30's and 70's could look 5 to 20 years younger after such new treatments. No wonder why our boys and younger men generations are more and more competing with women in the jewelry selection and beauty styles and supply ...LOL.
Imagine scenario when woman, who is in her 45, and her spouse is in his 55. After proper body and facial treatment, such woman may look, in average, a 15 years younger than her real ages. That means , if such couple appears publicly together they will, more likely, look like an average mid aged man with his beautiful and very young looking daughter!


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 7:13 pm 
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Joined: Sat Oct 04, 2008 9:57 pm
Posts: 26
Location: United States
I went to see Sveta one morning to pay rent for her apartment I was renting in south Moscow. She was an English teacher, and tutored privately also. At her table were 2 sexy beautiful ladies about 20 years old. She was giving them an English lesson. She tells me Mila's 30-minute lesson is finished, while her sister was taking a lesson would I visit with Mila and let her practice English with me. I say, sure she can practice on me. We walk outside and I buy some juice and water at the cantina. It is wam so we go up to my apartment for a glass of juice. I try to converse with Mila, but she understands very little that I say. So we go back down the street to where Sveta is staying with her parents. The girls leave. Sveta tells me they are terrible students, lazy and never study. She used to avoid students like them, but now she takes their lesson money anyway. Besides, their father is a wealthy Mafia type she says... So guys, when you go on your date with the sexy 20 year old you have been ogling on the web cam, thnik twice about what you do. Her father and two brothers could be just down the street on the other end of her cellphone. They probably don't have hillbilly shotgun weddings in Russia, but I don't want to find out what they do have.


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Thu Sep 24, 2009 12:41 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2009 8:58 am
Posts: 2
Location: United States
Since I fall into that over 50 looking for a younger woman category I thought I might share a few thoughts. First and foremost, how judgmental you all are!
Regarding the drama/maturity issue., I have worked in hospitals for close to 25 years. I am surrounded by women of all ages. I have met women in their early 20’s who are more mature than women in their 60’s. I can absolutely state that drama is not inversely proportional to age!--nor does it only exist in the female of our species! To state that you only wish to date older women because they are more mature and there will be less drama is a bit naïve. My experience (in my culture-USA-California) leads me to believe that somewhere between 25 and 30 years of age (plus or minus a few years) the “girl” becomes a woman. By that time she hopefully has figured out who she is and what she wants in life. If she is a drama queen, that will likely never change.
I have to agree about how great “older” women look these days. I was in the hospital cafeteria the other day. In front of me was this great looking woman-pretty face and an absolutely fantastic figure. She confided in me that she was having a birthday party that weekend for her 31 year old son. I told her she didn’t look over 35( she didn’t!!) she then told me she was 52! She would look great anywhere, any place, on any man’s arm--whatever his age!
Regarding the lady’s statement about what were you thinking about when you were 25. When I was 19, a sophomore in college, I dated a 24 year old UCLA anthropology graduate student. After that, I pretty much stuck with dating women older than myself. By the time I reached my mid to late 20”s, I was dating women in the mid 30 to mid 40 range. My favorite was Louise-43 years old--you could talk politics and philosophy in the morning--hit tennis balls with her in the afternoon--play bridge in the early evening-and although she was a little over weight and had a few gray hairs--was the most sensuous, sexy woman I have ever met! I guess the point here is that a relationship is a complex mixture of elements. Those elements are not necessarily age dependent. Who knows what element each person desires or brings to the table. Perhaps the younger person brings energy, vitality, enthusiasm and desires someone with more knowledge, experience and stability. Ideally the “perfect” relationship is a confluence of likes and differences that come together in a symbiosis that nurtures and enhances each individual of the relationship. If the relationship deteriorates into a parasitic relationship then it is time to sever the relationship.
The most obvious problem is what happens when you are 70 and she is 45. Don’t know. Guess we will deal with that when we come to it. The problem with we humans is that we wish to “fix” everything in time. The universe is moving towards maximum disorder and we want to “order” it--as if we could! I could be dead tomorrow, why should I worry about 5, 10, 15, 20 years from now. Don’t get me wrong! I plan for the future--too much so in the past--now realizing the future is now the present--and I should live in it.
My own reason for looking for someone younger is quite simple. I have raised 2 exceptional daughters. The oldest just graduated from one of our top law schools and is presently teaching law in China. I have no sons. I am wondering if it is too late to start again. Because of my age, most women would not consider me for fatherhood. In addition, I should say I am not looking for a woman for me--but for my son to be. I am looking for a truly exceptional woman. She will have to have great strength and character since she will most likely have to carry on raising our children after I am gone.
Off the subject a bit. After college I spent 2 years in India in the Peace Corps. 8 men married Indian women. Of those 8 couples, 2 women went back to India within 6 months. Within 2 years all but 2 women had returned to India. On a positive note, 2 couples are still together. If you are concerned about drama, then imagine how many misunderstandings can occur when you come from different cultures and speak an entirely different language!
Ps--because of this, and also because I spent yesterday perusing the ladies posts--I probably will be spending more of my time looking closer to home--thanks, R
Pps -I am a paying member but for some reason I am denied the right to post--so I created Robert-thanks


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 4:00 am 
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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 7:54 am 
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Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 10:56 am
Posts: 63
Location: Ukraine
robjam wrote:
First and foremost, how judgmental you all are!

thanks Robert for your oppinion. I know it is difficult to say something opposite from the wide taken ideas...and don't take what is said as a "judgmental". As I understand the world is really very very big and there are a great lot of different people there. Surely you can find what you seach (your ideal person):
- the woman who doesn't need your love (because you "...not looking for a woman for me--but for my son to be...")
- who is near 20 - 25 yaers old
- who is ready only to make a son for you
- who is ready to grow up her children at the foreign country with bad knowlege of language
- who is ready for low income because she will never get a good job but you gone (in 5? 10? 15?)
- who is ready to leave her family and environment because you are so remarkable
- who has great strength and character

I am sure there are such women, surely they exist and one day you can find her...but as you understand such women can be very very seldom. It can take you much time and money to find her moreso you can get great dissapointments during your search because you are looking for something what is very rare.
As for me I don't know anyone like this....but I have heard a story about the milliarder who is 70 and married russian model 20 yeas old...now she tells everybody that she loves him for his brillian mind.
You might only count your opportunities what you can suggest such lady...or you might be ready you can face with a deceit or with her desire to leave you right after geting the green card.
May be really it is better for you to search such woman in your own country it would not be so expensive and bad for your nerves.
Sorry if any my words could offend you :-( you told yourself 2:8 in your case even less. By the way you didn't mention what was the age difference between these coupls


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 Post subject: Re: 20-year old woman?
PostPosted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 4:54 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2009 8:58 am
Posts: 2
Location: United States
Olga, I have read many of your posts. I was expecting something quite wise from you. Thanks for not disappointing me! One of the things I have learned is to never try to win an argument with a woman! Hope that didn’t sound too sexist. If it did I apologize. I have said for years that I think words get in the way of communication-probably even more so when our native languages are quite different.
Regarding your points:
--1) I hate to state the obvious, but there are many types of “love”. In my experience, the “love” that makes your scalp sweat and your heart beat a hundred beats per minute is not always the love that will keep you together for years to come--it certainly can help! But it will not keep you together for 20 years.
2)-Looking for my son--Of course I am looking for a woman for me! I meant I am looking for traits in her that I would like my son/children to have. Are you telling me that women who are considering having a family don’t do the same?? By the way--all those women in bathing suits and sexy poses--I don’t even bother to look.
3)--Actually, I thought I made it clear that I thought a woman is “mature” enough between 25 ad 30. My actual search range is 27 to 40. Frankly, this is probably what bothers me the most in this entire thread--the age discrimination attitude. The attitude that a 25 year old woman is not mature and that a man in his 50’s is too old for her.
4)--If she is on this site I assume she would be willing to relocate to the U.S.A.. I’ve known many people who have relocated from another country to the U.S.. Usually a reciprocity of travel is indicated. Family members come this way to visit. They go home every few years.
5)--”bad knowledge of language”. --Why is this a given? I probably will not be able to establish a connection with a lady I cannot communicate with. Therefore, we will probably never be together. I am intrigued by the possibility of learning Russian.
6)--”low income”.--Why is this a given? The lady I am looking for will be intelligent, educated, and have decent language skills, and I would expect her to continue her career. This is the “Land of Opportunity”!!!!.--oh yeah, I am not rich--but I am not poor either. I do not think she would have to worry after I am gone.
7)-- I am quite comfortable with who I am. I know my strengths and weaknesses. In some ways I am just your average guy--and in some ways I am quite remarkable. In fact, I think there are a lot more remarkable people out there than you think! Unfortunately the world beats people down. They never get to discover their talents. They never get to discover how remarkable they can be. Perhaps we “older” people can be not only a husband, a father and a lover, but also a mentor.
8)-- The minute a woman starts to massage my ego I head the other way.
9)--Green card--I think that is age independent. And, I am sad to say, I wonder if it is the main reason most women are on this site. Too bad. There is a good life to be had here.


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