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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Tue Sep 08, 2009 8:09 pm 
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Yes Olga you are right when you meet the right person it is magical I meet Sveta On Monday and by Wedensday night we were engaged. And spent all the rest of the time together. Unfortunately the first week was wasted on all the women that I was writing to.


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2009 10:05 am 
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smurf89 wrote:
Yes Olga you are right when you meet the right person it is magical I meet Sveta On Monday and by Wedensday night we were engaged. And spent all the rest of the time together. Unfortunately the first week was wasted on all the women that I was writing to.


Ok I agree...this is positive focus also. To have such bright moments at the life is a great thing I think. The week of mad love


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2009 12:23 pm 
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Can you tell me if that is concidered Ok to meet several ladies on a trip?


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2009 3:50 pm 
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mikeucovich wrote:
Can you tell me if that is concidered Ok to meet several ladies on a trip?

Dear Mike :lol: if I shall answer certainly NO...i afraid nothing would be changed, as i understand any way you are going to have a reserve. at least i hope you are clever enough not to tell about to the woman...
by the way there are men who put to the profile fotos with other woman....a clever step???


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2009 4:36 pm 
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I have to agree but so many times I have heard that some travel and meet several of the ladies they have been writting too. Some say this is Ok as many of the ladies will meet with several of the men before they choose. To me both seem deceptive. Thanks for your answer


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Wed Sep 09, 2009 6:11 pm 
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Well mike to write to just one lady and go meet just her. Some men get lucky and this works for them but they are few and far between. I have been looking for the right person for almost 4 yrs. Letters are just letters that is all. You and the woman can write the most romantic letters to each other till pigs fly. But if the two of you don't like each other in person the letters and all the time to write them count for nothing.

I hate to stoop to this but if you are going bird hunting. Which do you have the best chance of success with a single shot 22 or a 20 ga

Here is something else if you write to meet just one woman and things run aground after just 2 days pack up and go home.


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Thu Sep 10, 2009 12:53 am 
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Yes, that could be a very expensive trip if you realize there is no chemistry from teh first moment.

What to do then???

On the other hand, consider the lady, who now feels like she is just #4 on your list of 10 women.

I guess that's all the more reason to be as certain as you can before you fly and be honest about your intentions with each lady.

And if nothing else, be a good tourist :D

I honestly don't know what I'd do in this situation.

-stan


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Thu Sep 10, 2009 7:07 am 
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Maybe you should just plan a short trip!! :lol:

Personally, This may not seem very smart from one perspective, but I want my woman to KNOW I am coming to see HER. Perhaps if she was aware and comfortable in this fact.. you just might get along better!.. Just a thought


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Thu Sep 10, 2009 8:58 am 
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mikeucovich wrote:
I have to agree but so many times I have heard that some travel and meet several of the ladies they have been writting too. Some say this is Ok as many of the ladies will meet with several of the men before they choose. To me both seem deceptive. Thanks for your answer


jscottv wrote:
Maybe you should just plan a short trip!! :lol:
Personally, This may not seem very smart from one perspective, but I want my woman to KNOW I am coming to see HER. Perhaps if she was aware and comfortable in this fact.. you just might get along better!.. Just a thought


I completely agree with you, Mike and James.
If I knew that the man is coming to see not only me, but also a few other ladies, I would part with him in a minute and with no regrets.

Eugenia.


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Thu Sep 10, 2009 8:50 pm 
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It depends on how well the two of you know each other. If you have only written a few letters to each other in a couple of months. Then it is best not to meet just one women.

But if you have a very good relationship over at least 6 months and you have daily contact on the phone. You know her life and she knows yours. You have been there for each other both in the good and in the bad of daily life. Then of course go and meet just her. You have a relationship one that is rock solid. And here is the main thing you are both going to overlook the imperfections that both are of you are going to have and see the inner person that has been there for you all those months.


A question for the ladies lets say that the guy you have been writing to for 2 months has decided to meet you. You pick him up at the airport and the first day everything is going great. Then after the second day that night while you are laying in bed before you go to sleep you are thinking to yourself. He is a very nice man. Polite very good manners a true gentleman. There is not one thing that you can find that is a problem.
But there is just one thing you can not see yourself with him for the rest of your life. No matter how you try there is just not a connection or spark.

So ladies what do you do and remember that it is just day 3 you have 11 more to go.


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 1:04 am 
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Hi everyone, I just want to say WOW, this forum has changed for the best, great idea with the ladies joining in, it seems pleasent to come here again, I have to admit I was discouraged in the past from all the negitive posts. I applaud the ladies for shareing there information with us, BRAVO! :)


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 1:55 am 
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Well, i think, that if i had this situation, Wayne, I would think first of course, you are right! then i think i would have an honest talking with the man, i mean i would ask him: what do you think about our meeting? what ideas come to your mind? what was the first thought when i met you in the airport? i think, that would give me some idea of where he is in his thoughts too.
And one more thing, sure there should be a chemistry thing, but what if it comes a little later? what if i see and feel something on our 5th day of meeting? I think that i would give that meeting a chance. Of course i am speaking about the situation when everything goes ok (he is good, and nice and kind, so on). If something goes wrong, i would rather tell honestly.


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 3:27 am 
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well i hope this is something postive for you all ,i fly to kiev on Tuedsay for our firsts meeting ,we met on the site in July and have spoken for about 30mins upto 2 hours nearly every day in skype. I have a very postive feeling about this and she has even started english lessons so the ladies who are genuine on here are very serious.

Dont give up hope ,there are scammers and liars in all walks of life ....but if you give up hope ,you give up trying ....then what is the point ?

We all choose our own path in life and for my experience so far i can only advise patience from both parties ,i will post the outcome of my visit when i return at the end of september and hopefully it will all be good news ,my instincts already say it will after hours of conversations.

One tip which has already been mentioned .... standards from both parties....i couldnt agree more....this is how you build mutual respect & complete honesty and that is the first foundation for any relationship .

Keep trying everyone i will let you all know how it goes ,
Dean


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Fri Sep 11, 2009 5:03 am 
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smurf89 wrote:
A question for the ladies lets say that the guy you have been writing to for 2 months has decided to meet you. You pick him up at the airport and the first day everything is going great. Then after the second day that night while you are laying in bed before you go to sleep you are thinking to yourself. He is a very nice man. Polite very good manners a true gentleman. There is not one thing that you can find that is a problem.
But there is just one thing you can not see yourself with him for the rest of your life. No matter how you try there is just not a connection or spark.
So ladies what do you do and remember that it is just day 3 you have 11 more to go.

Why doesn't man make any efforts? why doesn't he try to fire this spark? Certainly if he indeed strongly interested about this woman. If only politeness it is impossible to engage love, there should be emotions, courting process, awakening her sexy.

The man should dismiss his tail (have you ever seen peacocks when they are enamoured), show her how strong you are interested about her... politeness is not enough at all.

At the female's forum one girl has shared her impressions about the first meeting... he is polite very good manners a true gentleman. There is not one thing that you can find that is a problem...... But!!!! during all time of this meeting she has not understood what were his feelings. On the last day he told that he liked her a lot and invited her with visit... but she was puzzled a lot what it was???? From his side she has not noticed any emotions. So what was fired during this meeting? although from the very beginning it was a good bonus for serious relations — she was very positive about him and opened for love...
Sorry, I shall not make any forecasts and to be in a hurry with conclusions...may be everything is good in the future :-)

:D :D Forgive, but what is said by me here does not concern situations when he is 50 years old and even more and he goes for a meeting with the girl near 20 years (especially if she has an appearance of a modell).... Forgive, but at such cases everyone receives what he searches. :twisted: :mrgreen:


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 Post subject: Re: Positive focus
PostPosted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 10:54 pm 
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Yes it can be very hard to tell the other persons feelings towards you. And Russian and Ukrainian women or very good at hiding their feelings both good and bad.

She made think that you are perfect and she will not show the slightest hint of it. Or she may be just wishing that the night was through and away from you but you can not tell she will not let her emotions show.

Even the woman that I was engaged to I had no idea how she felt The first two times that we went out. And that is the one good thing about using an agency at the end of every date the manager calls the woman and asks the lady what her feelings are towards you. Then that next morning the manager will tell you.

It may be a difference in cultures here a woman if she like you she will let you know. She may touch your hand or place her hand on your leg. If she likes she will let you know. Also if
you place your hand on her knee. Well if she slaps you that is not good. But if she doesn't move her leg away or remove your hand then she likes you. To be honest I don't know if that is acceptable to Russian or Ukrainian women

So Olga how would you let a man know that you are interested in him.


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