Qustion, would you continue to Correspond with others here?

Question, if you have felt that perhaps this girl is the right one, would you continue to correspond with others as “friends” To me this is a bit like keeping the door open just in case it does not work out. Do the women on here continue to correspond with other men after they have made a connection with you? What are your thoughts? Like I said its kind of like planning for failure but is it the normal procedure for the ladies here? I would also like to ask would you ask your lady to at least change her profile to reflect that connection and perhaps remove the bikini photo?

If you feel that you must tell the woman you are corresponding with to change her profile or photos, I think you have entered a wrong path. If you cannot accept her now, how will it be later? Most people don't like other persons that want them to change something at the beginning of a correspondence.
- I think the woman will stop writing to you.
- Or keep on writing to you, but start to have secrets that you will not learn about.

Even if we don't like "our" girlfriend to correspond with other men, I think it is necessary to accept it. - On the other hand I think it is okay for us men to write to different women at the same time.
In some very rare cases two people know from the first time they meet, that they will spend the rest of their life together.
In most cases it is necessary to learn each other well, before you are able to make qualified decisions! Let's not cheat ourselves and pretend that we are the ideal couple, before we know each other really well, both the nice sides and the ugly ones..

if both the lady and the man our sincere in there comunications they will both remove there profiles here, but if there is any question of comitment they will remain. Of coarse letters will be written to others from both sides, thats life.

I have a friend I made here.. Lydia, she is coming to the USA to marry a gentleman she has met.. I am so happy for her. We began to speak as friends and she has given me good insights. I think it is good to have friends, as long as everyone is open and honest and there is no hidden agenda. I am happy to speak with Lydia and wish her well.

I agree with completely with jscottv.

First perhaps I miss worded as it is not a trust issue but a respect issue, and I'm also not speaking of a new contact but a lady you have been coresponding with and planning a trip to spend time. It also has nothing to do with changing a lady. But i would feel uncomfortable to search and chat with other women while i'm planning a possibe future with someone. Of course If did remain friends on this site i would change my profile to reflect that interest so as not to lead anyone to believe i'm untruthful or lack respect.

Just to let you know both my wife and I leave open onsite.. Both she and I have made alot of friends and she has found many friends she grew up with that could not be found. So the coresponding goes as far as do you trust one another or not! I would not change a thing it has only gotton better between larysa and I, been over in ukraine several times and it has always been pleasure. Maybe I was just one of the lucky ones but then again I have taken others over there with me and they all so has no regrets. But then what do I know I have only been married my beatifull wife for 3 well almost 3 years the 20 I was married before turned to disaster. I found that listning to others when it comes to matters of the heart only will make them happy, so who are you trying make happy you or them. It would be like I am going to take away your phone cause I don't trust you get my point. All any one really wants is to be with the right one to begine with and when you are there's no secret's do what you think best you know whats right from wrong so will she when truely LOVE ONE ANOTHER! Sincerly John and Larysa: success with loversplanet!

Again it's not a matter of trust but respect, but i guess most will focuse on the negitive and only see some sort of control when i speak not of any control but simple respect.

If I was with someone, I would want to make sure she understood she was the only one. Having a conversation with another woman here, where you found your other half seems on the whole, dishonest.

If I am happy and satisfied, there is no reason for me to pursue another woman and no reason to make my loved on in any way insecure.

Thank you as you explained my thoughts better than I did.

Don't be romantic about dating on a dating web site!
There is not ONE woman who would be a suitable wife for you. There are SEVERAL suitable women.

Romantic LOVE is pleasant, but it has very little with real life to do.

We "fall in love" with some one we are corresponding with. But what is is that you are "in love" with?
Is it really the woman in the real world?
Or is it the picture of a woman as you see her?
Or do you simply like to be "in love"?
A serious long-time relation and marriage is not built on a futile feeling of being in love.
We must be realistic about the situation. We must build our marriage on "solid ground".
Number 1 task is to get to know each other very well in real life, not only in letters or phone calls. And to find out if we really have the same goals in life..

I do not know about you but the 3 friendly women, I was socially emailing here, have stopped emailing me since I mentioned meeting someone else in a forum post...I do feel more comfortable and focused this way..as I do want to get too distracted from the job at hand, but there was never any romantic talk with the 3 ladies..and it is nice to learn more about their life in EE from different sources..

You write: "3 friendly women, I was socially emailing here, have stopped emailing me since I mentioned meeting someone else in a forum post."

I don't understand what you mean by "socially emailing". I believe that the women and the men here have a common goal: To find a partner for the rest of his/her life.
- These 3 friendly women who have stopped emailing you, did they write to you as a penpal or looking for a future partner?
- It IS quite natural to choose among different partners. Both men and women do this, I suppose. - But you must be quite open about it.

Tell the woman you are writing to, what you like about her and what you two have in common. This would make a good start. Don't make the girl think that SHE is the right one, if you have not made up your mind yet.
Being honest is always better than pretending some feeling.
This is of course much easier said than done in real life

as they say ?? you are not alone. theres always someone else??

If you look at it from the ladies viewpoint, there is over 90% chance that a man will never actually make a trip to Russia or wherever. I don't think it is fair of a man to ask her to cut off her ads. I don't think it is a good idea to try to take a penpal relationship to a higher level with someone you have never met in person. But today, exchanging internet videos is hugely better than just emails and pics. So it can happen. If it does I would recommend you prepare a Plan B. It is just too expensive a trip, not to, unless you are wealthy enough to travel a lot. Acquire the names and emails of about a dozen other nice ladies in the same city as the one you are hooked on, in case Plan A fails. Get the names and addresses of marriage agencies in that city who could quickly arrange meetings for you with other ladies, in case Plan A fails. What are the chances of Plan A succeeding? Who knows. The 1st lady I met on my 1st trip was probably the nicest, and the best match for me. But of course, I wanted to meet the other two ladies I had emailed. It upset her a bit, but to be honest, they expect that to happen, they didn't just get off the boat, they know all the angles. Some ladies will try to rush you into bed, thinking that will cut off the rest of the ladies on your list. Generally, I would say use your first trip just to establish a mutual attraction, then on the 2nd trip just plan to see that one special lady. But even on the 2nd trip, you might want to have a plan B available...