Have I been scammed or was it something else

These requirements will limit your search significantly.

Yes, but I think it will generally limit your options in a good way, i.e., decrease your chances of being used or having a girl get overwhelmed by culture shock and running back to Russia or wherever after six months.

3) A Russian or Ukrainian woman without children will be in her early 20s. She won't like the idea of being a mother to 3 children.
Many divorced women with 1 kid are extremely beautiful.

Sure, it's possible to find a good girl with kids. If you're prepared to jump into marriage and fatherhood on the same day, go for it. But be careful and remember, as many have pointed out, that the kid is the most important thing to the mother and may even be her primary reason for wanting to find a husband. And please don't go into it saying, "Oh, well, I guess I can deal with a kid." You will indeed be responsible as a parent at that point. Be ready to pay bills, help with homework, etc. The original poster sounds like he did this and more even though the kid was essentially grown. Too bad this happened to him; he seems like a nice, responsible guy.

On a side note, I see a lot of Eastern women waiting a little longer to have kids. Late 20s, early 30s.

2) Many college degrees are not transferable. Many women will have to study to get a decent job.

Yes, but the existing degree demonstrates a willingness to do something other than sit around and be taken care of. She also has a better chance of being more intelligent and self-aware in general. I know, plenty of college women (and men) are still stupid when they come out, but it does help. I happen to live in New York, where they are more opportunities for native Russian speakers.

1) Many women don't speak good English or German or French, but they are eager to learn languages. You'll have to compete more for a woman with good English, and her profession will be an English interpreter, which is not the best profession in the UK or the USA.

If they are that eager to learn, they will have some English already. And I suppose we must all gauge our own level of competitiveness. Also, learn some Russian. Meet the lady halfway. Take an interest in her culture, not just her pretty face, sexy accent, and family-centered attitude.

The topic's author has his own son. It would've been more difficult for him to find a lady without kids.

If you marry a woman with a kid, you should treat her kid as your own. Otherwise, the relationship will break up.
If you're 20 years old, you can even look for a virgin. If you're over 30, you should loosen your requirements.

Actually, I proposed to a beautiful and smart woman with a kid many years ago. I would've had a nice boy to play male games and do things together if she had said, "Yes." But now I'm lonely.

Strangely, my first requirement is love. If you love a girl and she loves you, you enjoy everything in her and forget about the above mentioned problems.

I don't want to limit myself to 22-year-old girls without kids with perfect English and excellent education.
From my humble experience, such ladies don't want me for sure.

You never know Barabaika, the right one could come along anytime! But I agree, If the girl is the right one for you, you won't care if she has a child.

Perhaps, your wife's time away will give her time to reflect on her choices and what she has attained. She may be back yet![/quote]

Thanks for the imput, I know she will not be back as a good friend gave me a tip that ALL men should do. I was asked to type in her name her age her city and state nothing else. i did this on Google. about 20 diferent russian date sites poped up with her personal add posted. it showed that she had been on for some time and put that she was divorced (we are not yet). i was shocked at my own stupid mindset thinking she cared, she only cared for the green card. but we have only been married for over a year, she is looking for a new,wealther suger daddy to move a step up on the ladder.
what can i do to protect myself? how can i remove my name from her sponcership or am i just screwed?

This is an opinion only (based on some practical knowledge)

Let's start with the obvious and go from there...

1.Be sure all of your credits card numbers are changed and your joint bank accounts closed and door locks changed.
2 File for divorce being sure to use abandonment as one of the reasons.
3. Began copying all of the website information where she is listing herself. Do a page copy, be sure to collect the dates she "joined", this will be invaluable in court during the divorce and when interviewing with the USCIS to establish motive.
4. You are required as her sponsor to report what is happening to the USCIS. you don't know where she is.. how can you support her?
4. Contact a good immigration lawyer (as swell as divorce) to discuss the situation and how to proceed
5. Make an appointment with USCIS to discuss your case, ask what can be done, report your suspicions and evidence (take paper copies of files and her web page screen shots).

Please understand.. if the time is this short together and she has been doing this from the beginning, then she is guilty of FRAUD in order to obtain legal status. In today's political environment the position of the USCIS is much different against cases like this than in the past. In the past they would simply look the other way... today, they are much more discerning. She may still be able to stay, however there is a very good chance she could be deported and black listed for further immigration. (which she deserves)

Sorry for sounding like a mean person, but you have been used and abused, you must protect yourself and hopefully help others from falling into the same trap.