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 Post subject: An observation...
PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 12:05 pm 
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Just an observation, I have been off and on this site for several years now. I have had the opportunity to have been in contact with several ladies. A few months back before my accident I was in contact with a couple of ladies who seemed very genuine. However I lost contact with them while recovering and so I sat back and just studied this site. My observations are just that an observation from my perspective.

1st I believe to many of the ladies believe in fairy tales. Why do I think this well they seem to be under the illusion that some rich prince is going to read their profiles drop what they are doing fly across the world and sweep them off to a life of luxury. Good luck with that fantasy perhaps that works in the movies but in real life?

2nd Men who are 20 years older than some of these ladies believe these beauties are attracted to them. Let’s say you are my age late 40’s some young beauty bows your neck you spend the time to win her love. Now what? this young lady is not going to sit around and play bridge she is going to want children are you really going to do the daddy thing at 50 or 60 years of age? Are you going to hang out with the twenty crowds? Come on get your head on straight.

3rd The cruel truth is many older men want some great looking eye candy on their arm and some of these young ladies want a new life. A perfect match until both have achieved their goals. Then what?

I believe there would be a great many real connections if both the men and the ladies would get their collective heads out of (umm) the clouds. If you truly want to find a long and lasting relationship then walk in with your eyes wide open, keep it real, and be honest of what you seek.

Like I said this is just one mans observation, but believe me after my accident I did not hear from the ladies I was talking too? My guess is that my injuries interfered with their quest for that new life they seek. And as a Russian friend told me too many western men only seek outward beauty.

For those who understand the difficulties and are prepared for the realties then I believe you will find your love, good luck.

Mike


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 12:50 pm 
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In reply to the last post.First and foremost with this kind of dating you have to get the age gap correct,this is so important to even getting off the starting blocks.Guys wake up,stop dreaming,dont set yourself up for heartache in the future.Do you really think that a 15,20 plus year age gap between you and a russian women is going to work???The answer is a big NO,when you are 60 if it lasts,you will be playing bingo and an old age pensioner while your princess will be out clubbing and meeting younger men THATS even if it lasted!!!!
Get the age gap right first and like Thumper posted keep communication short and if you are serious visit your lady asap,you will not be dissappointed believe me.
One other big NO is to visit many ladies in one visit.If they find out you, you have no chance and they will.It is also very disrespectful and not a good start.
Be confident,choose wisely and be truthful it pays great dividends on finding the correct lady,from experience!
Hope this helps guys!


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 6:01 pm 
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Bridge??? Bingo???...

Guys, if I EVER end up sitting around playing bridge and bingo, I give you all permission to come hit me in the head with a hammer and put me out of my misery!!

Every couple is unique.. and while I agree that the closer the ages are for the couple, the better chance of a possible match. I don't think this is always a requirement.

I also must say on behalf of the ladies that we should give them far more credit and respect than to believe that they are looking only for an escape route and will leave a good and loving relationship just because a younger man smiles at her and attempts to lure her away.

If you treasure her, care for her, treat her tenderly and listen to her heart... make her feel secure and needed. Give her a happy environment, challenge her mind and ideas... I believe she will stay with you. AND love you all the more because she will know that a shallow smile will never replace a deep commitment, and a loving and secure family.

Just what I think...


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 6:50 pm 
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As I have said, for some who walk in with eyes open it can work but such an age gap? I have to question what will happen in the long run? As I also stated not all the ladies, but many look for their prince charming to ride in and sweep them off to the land of luxury. If I offended some then I must ask do they fall into that category. If not why offended?
As for the bingo or bridge line that was meant as a example but I do not see myself going out to the local night clubs with twenty year olds when I’m fifty so how could I expect some young lady in her twenties to want to go out and do things that us 50 year olds or in my case late 40’s likes to do?


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 8:25 pm 
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Mike,

Something tells me that at 70 you are still gonna be scuba diving and riding that motorcycle!!.. :D


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 11:55 pm 
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My observation when I read the Success Stories is that there are precious few successes over the course of a year...or maybe many go unheralded. I am a success example that defies the age odds. In March Lyuda will have her 34th birthday. On or about April 16, she will be exactly half my age. She decided at a very young age that young Russian men were a waste of time. When we began emailing in 2006 I asked multiple times if she would explain in detail why she felt I was not too old. Her replies never varied. I pointed out that I was older than her deceased father and close in age to her grandmother. I sent a spread sheet showing my age, her age, and her daughter's age up to my 90th birthday. Notes were included. Example: 82 - I'll be very old in appearance, physical capabilities, perhaps mental capabilities (maybe not). You will be 48. Do you want to be taking care of me? What if I live a long time? Is this a risk you will resent? Her confidence in our relationship never wavered. Here's my point. Two people of any age can make it work if they both want to. Conversely, two people who are "age matched" can crash.
Yes, these girls are hoping for a fairy tale. Lyuda Zakharova found one. And I found my fairy tale (a beautiful trophy wife who actually loves me). Our Florida license plate says cka3ka, Russian for fairy tale.
Don't begrudge these girls their dreams. Most of them will not be picked. Many will pour their hearts out in letters and never get very far. Men will stop writing with no explanation. But I think they are having fun doing it. I visited their chat site (with Lyuda's help) and many more women seem to be chatters. It's a real sewing circle (idiom, girls!). They sounded happy to me; whereas quite a few male forum comments seem not so happy.
Lyuda is upstairs right now with two Russian friends doing translation work. Tonya just came home from a movie with another teenager. The other girl is spending the night. I have the Bears - Vikings game playing loud on TV in the background. Life is good. In other words, I played the LoversPlanet lottery and won.
I was born on the same day, month, and year as Mohammed Ali. We will both be 68 on Jan 17th. He seems old because of his Parkinsons. I'm young, athletic, active in my business, etc. Age is a relative thing. We're taking these Russian students to the beach on New Year's Day. They are from Yakutsk, the coldest city in the world, and he wants to send photos of himself swimming in the Atlantic on that day.
Enjoy this site. Treat these girls like the princesses they dream of being. If you find a bad one, drop her. If you find a good one and feel the magic, marry her. Happy New Year from a LoversPlanet alumnus.


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 11:49 am 
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yes Scotty I do hope that is true but to be fair I'm 47 years old now and I will not be going out to some nightclub doing beer bombs with 21 year olds thats just the hard truth. So all i'm really saying for both the ladies and the men be realistic and think it through communicate and get your head out of the clowds.


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:44 pm 
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Anton66 wrote:
Get the age gap right first and like Thumper posted keep communication short and if you are serious visit your lady asap,you will not be dissappointed believe me.

One other big NO is to visit many ladies in one visit.If they find out you, you have no chance and they will.It is also very disrespectful and not a good start.

Well, a lady can play a game; especially, if she is young and popular.
You can show your chivalry by coming quickly and not communicating other ladies.

But she will look at you from a distance at the airport, tell herself that you don't look like Brad Pitt, and even won't come to say hi. What will you do?


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 6:44 pm 
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That’s easy go out find a nice room, go eat a nice meal have a few drinks and plot your revenge :twisted: …lol and for the record Brad Pitt is a punk :lol:


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 6:46 pm 
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Thanks Barabaika for your question!
I think from experience there is always a risk of turning up at the airport and the lady not liking you or vice versa,thats life it happens!
Certainly like i say,do your homework well and choose wisely.You can minimise the problem of not liking someone at the airport by exchanging many photographs as the camera tells the truth and use your common sense.
This type of dating is not for the faint hearted,life is full of chances,should i,shouldnt i,what if etc.If you dont take a chance you will never know,it may take a few times to get it right,so worth it when it works out,believe me.
I was in Ukraine a fortnight ago and had such a meeting in the airport and must admit was one of the nicest experiences for a very long time and i am due to return in feb.
Hope this helps,i wish other guys would share their experiences too.
Have faith,best of luck!


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 8:08 pm 
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If I show up and no one meets me.. I'm calling barabaika. :lol:

Maybe I could convince him to show me around and introduce me to some the ladies he's been writing too! :mrgreen:


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 9:30 pm 
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If I show up and there is no one there to meet me. I will go find someone to meet lol. There are what 10,000,000 more woman there then men? Besides why let her ruin your trip. Go out and enjoy yourself and enjoy the sites while your there, go take a tour or something. You only live once :D


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:33 pm 
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Guys you are so cynical?????
Why are you on this site and why are women on this site..........because we want to meet someone.Why wouldn`t the lady you are writing to not be there to meet you if you are exchanging letters and pics?
Have some confidence in yourselves and Russian ladies!!!!


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Wed Dec 30, 2009 1:44 pm 
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I think we are all just responding to barabaika comment that what if she ditches you at the airport? So come on lighten up Anton66 I think the responses are all in fun :lol: I mean if it happens it happens I will be in a new country so I would just get out and meet the locals thats all.


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 Post subject: Re: An observation...
PostPosted: Wed Dec 30, 2009 3:46 pm 
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No worries Mikeucovich thats fine!
Just seems barabraika posed a serious question.
Wonder how many guys who post replys have actually met with a Russian lady,i`m sure the figures would be low???
Lets have some story`s guys......


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